Just the Facts, Ma’am


Sam left, Suz right

Urgency Day 408

500 Things Items 92-93: Old Bike Helmets

  • History: Purchased
  • Value: Priceless protection of craniums
  • Parting pain: None other than replacement costs
  • Un-possessing: Unfortunately helmets don’t recycle– trash?

Once again, three nudges make a poke. This time the cumulative pokers are Paul, Donna and, well me. I bruise easily, so I want us to stop poking me.  Ouch!

But we’re right. My little chart at the beginning of each 500 Things entry where I give just the facts, ma’am about the departing items has become a bit obscure. I was trying to document efficiently a few consistent facts about the loot in the project, so that at the end of this whole exercise, I could quantify it all and discover if there were any patterns.

Remember? I’m a pattern seeker.

But I quickly got too cute by half and the informational aspect was subsumed by the quirky entertainment aspect I could include in each posting. I do think the facts are important to the endeavor, however, so I am going to try to rein myself in a bit.

Presenting the new 500 Things Transparency Template:

  • History: In which I tell from whence an item came to our family–purchase, gift, etc.
  • Value: In which I convey the joy (but often lack thereof) an item has provided my family
  • Parting pain: In which I reveal how bereft or gleeful I am at its un-possessing
  • Un-possessing: In which I confirm the method of dispersal—donation, sale, etc.– from our home

This should clear things up and keep me on track for my eventual “data reconfiguration and statistical analysis.”

In other words, pattern seeking, with a Friendsly flourish.

Acknowledging that today’s post was more about housekeeping than anything, I will provide a bit of entertainment in the form of an adorable picture my friend Scott posted on Facebook:  Six frolicking raccoons and their mama, assembled in his family’s backyard.  As Scott’s wife, my friend Rose, said,

Mom was a bit fresh to us, but she sure did a good job keeping her babies safe. They’re very cute, but it’s a little unnerving to look out the back door and see 7 raccoons in our backyard.

Surely there must be more than coincidence at work with the timing of our wildlife postings? I will leave each gentle reader to weave the proximity of these observations into their own karmic tapestries.

As for my own take: I think Naperville has gone WILD!

Also, relevant to the bike helmets referenced at the beginning of this post, they were for Sam and me. Sam has outgrown his and mine was crumbling.

They were also incredibly stinky.

Wildly stinky, even.


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